Dr. Ariel has worked with Asperger-neurotypical couples for years.
Whether you or your partner has Asperger syndrome, this book will help you better understand Aspergers. Dr. Ariel stands apart from many marriage therapists in that she understands many Asperger characteristics and helps both spouses better understand each other.
She includes loads of practical problem solving exercises that would help any marriage, not just an Aspergers-NT marriage.
Ideal conversation must be an exchange of thought, and not, as many of those who worry most about their shortcomings believe, an eloquent exhibition of wit or oratory. Emily Post My Attempt at Brazilian Conversation I grew up in Brazil, South America. I attended a Brazilian, Portuguese speaking school, from kindergarten through fourth grade. […]
This video exposes Caucasian stereotypes about Asian Americans.
It got me thinking, “What kinds of stereotypes do neurotypical people have about Aspergians and autistics?”
There are a number of famous people with autism: Clay Marzo, Darryl Hannah, Temple Grandin are just a few. Each one of them has different strengths and weaknesses. So do you. Every person, whether famous or not, has gifts, talents, and purpose. And every person who perseveres despite flaws and adversity makes a difference in the […]
Generally, when we are getting to know someone as a friend, we naturally keep pace with the rate our new friend is disclosing about himself and he or she keeps pace with us. If I tell you about my love of cats, you might tell me about your interest in web design. If after we’ve known each other for a while, I tell you about how my parents’ divorce affected me, you would likely share something personal about yourself. Even if you had not gone through the same experience as me, you would likely share an event of a similar caliber that impacted you emotionally. And this is generally, how friendships are built—slowly over time, brick by brick.
So how might you apply this on a first or second date:
1. Before the date, think of topics that are of a low level of disclosure that would be good to talk about—college majors, where you grew up, a passion of yours. If you have a tendency to open up too soon, remind yourself to slow down.
2. Listen for the other person’s rate of disclosure. Are they telling you about their trip to Jamaica or about something more personal? If they are opening up to you, consider what you might share with them that is personal without being TOO personal. But only take this step if you genuinely like the person because when you open up to people you are signaling your interest in them and starting to develop a bond.
3. If the other person is disclosing too much for your comfort level, try changing the topic to something lighter.
4. If you’re past the first date and you know you like this person, strive to match their rate of disclosure. And, most important, demonstrate empathy and interest in the other person’s story when they do open up by establishing eye contact and asking follow-up questions.